My Child Is Not Suffering

Wednesday, May 18, 2016


Recently I've been struggling with the beast that is 'mummy guilt'; this time because I've been comparing myself to other mothers on the internet, particularly on Instagram. I know it is silly, and that you only ever see a snapshot of people's lives, but some of the other mamas out there really seem to have their shit together. Today I didn't even brush my hair and I had chocolate for breakfast.

I find it so easy to forget that people only publish their 'highlights', even when I do exactly the same thing myself. The distance between my reality and other people's photos is so vast that I sometimes wonder where I am going wrong. I get lost comparing myself to people who appear to have spotless homes and permanently happy toddlers with stain free clothes.

In reality, I know that the images I see don't portray people's lives accurately, and that the things I worry about don't matter. I'm aware that what is really important is that Zach is loved, fed and watered, that he has a roof over his head and that we change his nappy on a regular basis. You know, the things that keep him alive and well. But somehow knowing that still doesn't stop me wishing I could do better.

I need to consciously remind myself that these comparisons I'm making are ridiculous, and that my child is not suffering because:

We let him have the odd piece of chocolate.

Our garden is overgrown.

He only has one pair of shoes.

We rarely take him to soft play.

His white vests all have stains on them.

We don't cut his sandwiches into shapes.

He doesn't wear designer clothes.

We've never taken him to the zoo.

His walls are painted boring magnolia.

We let him watch tv.

He does not have a strict bed time.

Our house is not spotless.

He doesn't have a teepee.

We haven't taken him abroad yet.

He has tantrums.

We don't iron his clothes.


Please tell me I'm not alone?


If you want to see the highlights of my life, then please do follow me on Instagram ;)

4 comments

  1. Kids have more than one pair of shoes?! Whats the point they grow so fast x

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  2. OMG! You're not alone. I was discussing this with someone the other day. It's crazy that we feel like this, comparing ourselves to others. I feel like this when I watch vlogs on YouTube, I see other people's lives and think 'God, all I did was work all day, come home spend a few hours trying to get a child to eat, wrestle him in and out of the bath, tidy the house (a bit) and then crash on the sofa'. Rock 'n' Roll!

    Keep doing what you're doing mama, you rock! xx

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  3. You are doing great lovely- social media really is just the highlights of our lives as you say. Mads and LL eat so many sweets and chocolate, watch far too much TV and have a fair few tantrums! Thats real life. xx

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  4. Definitely can relate to this! Mummy guilt is the worst and I've really struggled with it. There are definitely so many pressures on Mums to do the right thing all of the time! My little girl probably watches too much TV and eats too many biscuits (also Mummy's weakness!) but she is happy, healthy and loved! Just found your blog!xx

    ReplyDelete

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